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Vodka Diaries
The mystery here is not who the killer is, who died or whether someone died at all. The mystery is who the hell greenlit this undercooked script, deeming it worthy of being made into a film.
Jan 2018
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Kyaa Kool Hain Hum 3
As with politicians and the media, so it is with cinema – I guess we get the films we deserve. What next? Kya Super Stupid Hain Hum?
Jan 2016
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Teraa Surroor
...this film is as flat as Farah Karimi’s enviably slim waist, as bland as Maggi Noodles without the Tastemaker and as pointless in its existence as the human appendix.
Mar 2016
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Mantostaan
Manto’s writings are as relevant to our troubled times as they were when he lived. Their enduring meaning and beauty are completely lost though in this poor production.
May 2017
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Kuldip Patwal
As exasperating as its ideology is the narrative style, which jumps from flashback to flashback to – sigh – yet another flashback, for no particular reason other than that someone probably considered this a smart thing to do.
Feb 2018
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Patel Ki Punjabi Shaadi
...sometimes you can take an age-old stereotype and still make a refreshing comedy out of it. Patel ki Punjabi Shaadi is not even worthy of being deemed crude or offensive – it is just plain blah.
Sep 2017
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Mar 2014
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Mastizaade
The double entendre seems to be drawn from pubescent schoolboys just beginning to discover the female mammary glands and cursed with particularly low IQs.
Feb 2016
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Fraud Saiyaan
Warsi’s continuing career struggles may explain why he agreed to be a part of this formulaic, dull, misogynistic rubbish, but what is worse is that Fraud Saiyaan is a Prakash Jha Productions presentation, with the senior producer-director’s daughter Disha Prakash Jha as one of its producers. Seriously Jha-saab, why?
Feb 2019
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Jun 2017
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Humshakals
...is as flat as cola from a bottle that’s been left open for a year. Read that clearly please:
Jun 2014
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Sonu Ke Titu Ki Sweety
It is possible that Ranjan may make a better film some day, once he recovers from his raging hatred towards women and realises that in giving vent to that feeling, he is also repeatedly portraying men as manipulable fools and cowards.
Feb 2018
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One By Two
I've no doubt there are many great existential profundities that writer-director Devika Bhagat believes she’s addressing with this film. As the teenagers I know would say: it’s deep. Very deep, indeed. So deep that I drowned in a sea of boredom and just managed to escape.
Jan 2014
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Sep 2015
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31st October
Thousands of Sikhs were slaughtered, raped and driven out of their homes in the riots of October-November 1984. Their story needs to be told with delicacy and intelligence, not with the sloppiness and hollowness that are the hallmark of 31st October.
Oct 2016
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Satya 2
What turned Ramu from a pioneer into the creator of the most lacklustre sequel-to-a-classic in the history of sequels-to-classics?
Nov 2013
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Alif
...is proof, if any were needed, that good intentions need good writing, good direction and good production values to be translated into a good film. This is an important story. It just needs to be told in a better film.
Feb 2017
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Jul 2017
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Grand Masti
The women of GM are never more than a sum of their breasts and buttocks. The men here have their entire beings centred around their penises.
Sep 2013
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Great Grand Masti
Calls itself an “adult comedy” but is really directed at hormonally charged teenaged boys with a limited IQ (not the bright ones) – check.
Jul 2016
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MSG
ROFLMAOBTPWBBTFIFFWTYCPHI (rolling on the floor laughing my ass off because the promos were bad but the film is far far worse than you could possibly have imagined). Hehehe hehehe hehehehehehehehehehehe.
Feb 2015
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Rabba Main Kya Karoon
...is a cliché. To make matters worse, it’s lackadaisically acted, poorly edited, unimaginatively directed and stars two uncharismatic actors in the lead.
Aug 2013
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Aug 2016
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May 2013
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Ranchi Diaries
To be fair, Ranchi Diaries is not repulsive or puke-worthy or anything of that sort. It is just one of those thingies that makes you want to ask: why did anyone bother to make this? Seriously, why?
Oct 2017